A Mujahid's Letter to His Wife

~Things to ponder about~

Dedicated to my princess,

You never once complained when you knew we would have nothing. You were content on having what little you needed.

Where others would have left or moaned, you never once let out a sigh.You understood that what was written was what we would eat.

I never once complained about what was put in front of me to eat. As I knew it was your hands that brought it to me.

When I had nothing, I had you. We smiled as we saw the destruction around us knowing that these people were not true.

You never felt sympathy towards the enemy. You put your trust in your Rabb and in turn you followed me. Never did I have to wonder about my secrets, my honour, and my Deen were safe with you.

When enemy barked, you never flinched. You were strong and in turn made me strong.

We both know what hardships you faced just being with me but not a word did you speak.

Like a vanguard for this ummah, you concealed yourself. Where others would rush to please their desires, you were the essences of Taqwa.

Life was easy with you and it came so naturally to me. You were the extension of me and I would never need to finish my words because, who knows me better than you.

You knew your place best which was right by my side. It's the little things between us that make you so precious to me and you would have easily kept me going for a lifetime.

The way you would look at me with fire in your eyes showed me that I was the only one for you. You stole my heart and hid it away.

I loved your jealousy and I loved to tease you with the thought of others just so that I could know how dear I was to you.

What little chance would Satan have had against me when you ensured me that Fajr was the easiest of the Salahs? I loved that you would forsake me in an instant to fast a voluntary fast. I loved that Islam was dearer to you than my life and those of our jewels - our children.

Watching you makes me laugh as I wonder if my heart would ever want anything else as I see you feed our child, as you lift her out of the bath, and as you wipe her little nose and she makes her cute face. You will never find a diamond in the hands of another holder in the same worth as our little diamond deserves to be carried in your hands.

We could have all the worldly desires my love. But who sells the Eternal Paradise for the pleasure of the Passing Hour? Not us.

To you, the loyalties of my children lie. They will love what we love. They will love Allah Most Glarified Most High, they will love the Prophets and the best of Companions. They will love those who they never meet but will long to meet. They will love and follow them better than us. They will love to honor one statement; there is no God but Allah and Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah. Many will fall under the weight of it, but not them. Their hearts will beat to it. Their words will testify to it. Their hands will carry it with pride.

Don't ever think that I left you. Don't think for even a moment that amongst the worldly gift is there anything dearer to me than to walk home knowing that it will be you waiting behind the closed doors.

I went to find a better place for us. I went to fulfil the best of deals.

Quran taught me that this short life could be traded for the eternity. I saw it in the Quran that this life is nothing but a test.

And I am sure the One whose commandments I seek to follow loves me very much because He gave me you.   You are the hardest thing for me to give up.

It is told about the Jannah that the mind cannot comprehend what bounties await us in it. It is told that the eyes have yet to see and the ears have yet to hear of the bounties that await us in our home for forever. It is told that there, all the sadness will be forgotten. It is told of rivers of honey my love. It is told of rivers of milk and wine of purity. It is told of pearls and gold thrones. It is told of musk and cool breeze.

Is it not fitting for me to seek this land for you and our children?

I fear that now all the gates of opportunity  of this world will close behind me my love. I fear that others will now hunt me and I will have nothing worldly left to offer you.

I am sure you will send our sons to look for their father. Tell them that they will find me in every battle, in every fight where the black flag is flown. Tell them that the pain in this world is just a pinch and they will see with their own eyes what I see.

They will see the beautiful birds that will come to meet them in this path. Tell them that the Angels will call them by the best of names and most important of all, Allah will be pleased with them.

I once told you that only two things in this world will ever have me; you and death.

My life was incomplete and when I married you, it was filled with all the joys I could imagine. But now I must marry again. I must marry what was promised to me the moment I was born. I must marry my fate. I must marry my death.

After my day of death, will come my day of judgment. And if on that day I stand with the best of Allah's creation, with the permission of Allah - the Lord of Heavens and the Earth, I will beg for you. No one was worthier than you to stand next to me in this life, so why should I desire someone else in the next?

~Not just a letter, but a lesson to be learned~